I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
