He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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