She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
