funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
How external is "for external use only"?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
