Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
