I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
