Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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