shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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