No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
