I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
