Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
