actually, I'm a sock model
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Just high enough for therapy.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
