you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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