My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
