Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I think I died a long time ago.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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