At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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