Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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