Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
