just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
