: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
