you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
