sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
