The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize