I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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