I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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