I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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