Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize