i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
