So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
