I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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