I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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