Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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