dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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