Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
