he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
it was like having sex with a tree stump
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
