put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Randomize
