Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
