It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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