She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
