I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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