There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
