If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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