How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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