Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
