And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Dignity is for republicans.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
third nipple confirmed
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
