you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
