And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
