White coat. Heels.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
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