you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
You ruined the universe
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
