i always forget guys have bellybuttons
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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